Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Adventures in Introverted Parenting

I haven't really been active around here since DBlog week.  There just isn't really a whole lot happening in life on T1 front.  Things are more or less stagnant and I feel a little stuck.  My most recent visit to my Endo showed a slight drop in my A1c bringing it below 8.  While I have been disappointed in my results the last few visits, I am slowly accepting that my A1c really isn't that terrible.  It's higher than I'm accustomed to but could be a lot worse.  The doctor seems to agree with that.  He's asking me to focus more on testing at least a couple times a day 3 or 4 days a week than he is seeing my A1c get lower so we can get some good results to go off of for dosing adjustments if need be.  But diabetes isn't really what I want to talk about today.  In fact its completely unrelated.

When I was a kid I was definitely an introvert.  I was more content being in my room alone or with my brother digging through a pile of Legos, or wandering through the bushes behind our house hunting for lizards than I was going to friends houses or joining a large crowd of people.  I had friends that I associated with school and occasionally had sleepovers or play dates but overall I was happy to entertain myself and more often than not I spent my free time alone.  In High School it was the same.  I had a core group of friends that I would do things with.  But I was never the type to be at someone elses house everyday after school or going out every weekend.  And as an adult, little has changed.  I still need time to myself to recharge.  Some days at work I just want to lock myself in my office and tell the world to go away.  My wife and I have friends over for dinner or go play games with people and I enjoy.  But 9 times out of 10, if given the option, I would probably choose a night in reading or watching a movie over a night out.  I am content being alone or with a small group of people, large groups of people tend to stress me out, and interacting with new people is incredibly awkward for me.  My son, The Boy Genius, on the other hand is the complete opposite.  He is the epitome of an extrovert.  He loves to be around as many people as possible.  He like to be the center of attention.  He warms up to new people quickly and LOVES to talk.  We joke that he is going to be a lawyer one day because he can talk circles around you and will continue to argue his point long after it's been made, even if it's clear that he's wrong.  At least 5 times a day he asks if he can go to a friends house.  I try to impart on him the joys of spending time alone but that just doesn't do it for him.  It's hard for me to understand his need to always be accompanied by another person.  When we're at home, he wants me to be present for whatever he is doing.  If he is watching a show or playing a video game, he wants someone there to watch with him.  If he is reading, he wants you to lay with him while he does.  Meanwhile, I am wanting to sit alone and do whatever I am doing.  Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with him and I'm happy that he wants me involved in what he has going on.  But it can be hard sometimes when opposite things make us happy.  When he wants to go see a new friend, meeting new parents is an interesting experience.  Several of his friends have parents who would like to sit and talk for hours while I am trying to inch closer and closer to the door so I can make my escape.  I'd much rather text to make plans than make a phone call.  I can only imagine what some of the parents think about me.  That I'm stuck up or anti social.  But in reality I'm just super awkward and don't want to embarrass myself.  So each day is an adventure.  Trying to find the balance between his extrovert qualities and my own introverted ones.

Anyone else have this experience?  How have you made it work when your qualities are the opposite of your child's?

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